Stop Surviving, Start Thriving!


In our busy world, it is easy to live in the “shoulds.”

 “I should take my vitamins.”

       “I should drink more water.”

              “I should launch our next business project.”              

                     “I should clean my house.”

                            “I should find the best keyword for my Social Media campaign.”

                                   “I should call my friend and see how she is doing.”

                                          “I should exercise today.”

                                                 “I should start doing Facebook Live.”

                                                         “I should make healthier meals for my family.”

                                                                  “I should send a ‘thank you’ note to my friend.”

The “shoulds” can be overflowing! They fill our minds to the point that we regularly live with a level of sadness and discouragement. We cannot understand why we feel overwhelmed so often and so easily.

The “shoulds” can quickly take us to the place of “surviving,” where we wake up day after day with a list full of things to do. The adventure of what COULD BE is filled instead with what SHOULD BE. Life becomes about completing the next job, task, or project. We live with our mental or written TO DO lists, filled with more tasks than we could ever complete in one day. By the time we fall asleep, the next day’s list is already full, and the boring routine continues.

Thriving happens in the adventure of life, and it begins in the unknown.

It starts with stepping into the unexpected, having fun when you did not know fun was available. It’s that surprise lunch date with your spouse. Or, waking up and knowing you want to go on an impromptu hike or sit outside and read a book today. Maybe you choose to stand in the difficulty of a conflict, and the resolution brings you closer in relationship to the people involved. You face an obstacle that seems impossible and, as you continue to offer yourself to it, new possibilities open up that allow you to break through the challenge.

I want to invite you into the thrill and joy of thriving in life by living in the unknown.

Learn to follow your heart and live in the unexpected.

There are three steps to begin this process:

1. Honesty. Get honest about whether you are thriving in your life or only surviving.

2. Curiosity. If you are merely surviving, what would you like to have in your life? What do you find yourself wishing you had time to do?

3. Choice. If you can pick one thing you desire to have in your life, what would it look like for you to actively choose that?

These three steps are the basis of thriving. Your adventure begins when you interrupt the “shoulds” in your life. At first, this may feel difficult because most of us begin “shoulding” ourselves the moment we wake up. “I should really get started on that project at work.” From now on, instead of submitting to the “should,” use these steps to investigate what your heart wants to do.

1. Honesty – First, recognize the “should” is there. Maybe it’s one item, or it could be a whole laundry list of “shoulds.” If so, write them all out. If it is only that one big project weighing on your mind like a 20lb back pack, take the time to write honestly about it. “I am telling myself I should ________…”

2. CuriosityBegin to inquire deeper. “Do I want to do the project? Is it true that I have to do it? Will it produce the results I want? Will it take me toward the life I desire?” Using questions like these will help you get down to what your heart really wants and allows to know, “Yes, I want to do that” or “No, I do not want to do it.” (You do not HAVE to do anything. You get to DECIDE what is best for you.) If you realize you do not want to do it, let it go. Release the “should” and say, “No, for me, in this season, this project is not what I want to do.”

3. Choice – If you want to do the project, then choose to take one step today towards making it possible. Remember the adage that “The longest journey begins with a single step.” This is true with anything you choose to do.

As you begin to live in options, use these three, simple steps – Honesty, Curiosity, and Choice – and decide what YOU want to do!

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We love your comments! Share below what you learned that you want in your life and the step you chose to take toward making it happen.